Your mother raised you to be an INDEPENDENT survivor, not a WIFE.


Your mother never taught you how to love your self as a woman & be loved by a giving man. She taught you to depend on no one. Bottle up your emotions, because no one will understand. Put up a guard, put on a smile, so no one sees deep down you are struggling with life. To be strong by yourself, like your grandmother taught your mother. To be an independent survivor, not a wife. By: Ebrahim Aseem Follow @fuel4thebody

She taught you when someone asks how you’re feeling to always say, “I’m good”. When really you’re dying inside, because all your mother’s painful life, no one ever understood. #EbrahimAseem

She taught you, when you like a man, hide your true feelings from him. Always wait for a man to make the first moves, even if you secretly adore him. #EbrahimAseem

An independent woman repels a giving man, & attracts lazy men to her life. You’ve never met a providing man who can give you affection, patience & loyalty, because he’s not looking for an independent woman, he’s searching for a wife. #EbrahimAseem

If you are an independent woman who does everything for your man, cooks, cleans, motivates & financially has his back, but he doesn’t do the same for you, you’re not his independent woman, you’re his single mother. #EbrahimAseem

Your mother never taught you how to be a wife or how to be loved, because she was hurt by men in her past. Fooled to give her all by a man who played a role, investing in a relationship not built to last. She doesn’t want to lose you to a man. She subconsciously wants you to stay single, independent of a man, so she can be dependent on you & your energy. Your mother wants you to be married to her, as a daughter for life. #EbrahimAseem

Sometimes a daughter’s soul is older than her biological mother’s soul. You may be her biological daughter, but your spirit is more nurturing, giving, wise & motherly than hers is. This causes some mothers to envy their daughter’s spirit & potential. She sees you being the wife & nurturing mother she never was. #EbrahimAseem

She resents you for being born. She feels she had to compromise her dreams to raise you. This is why it may seem your mother speaks down on all good news you give her. Always asking:

“why aren’t you married yet?”
“Why aren’t you successful in your career yet?”
“Why can’t you keep a man?”
“Why don’t you have children?”
She sees your great potential & wants to discourage & break you like her mother broke her. Some mothers are jealous of their daughter’s spirit, light, vibe, aura & potential. #EbrahimAseem

Don’t let your mother break your spirit & speak doubt into your dreams. She is not your spirit’s mother. You are hers. Break the chains of the independent mind she bound your soul with. #EbrahimAseem

There is no self-love in being an independent woman or man. Be SELF DEPENDENT. Not (i)ndependent. “i” represents the physical body. “Self” is the spirit you are inside the body. #EbrahimAseem

There is a giving man, ready to walk into your life, take your hand & make you his wife. He will say, “baby, lay your burdens on my heart. Rest your over thinking mind on mine. #EbrahimAseem

When you’re mine, you’re constantly on my mind. My effort won’t decline. My interest won’t subside. My understanding heart will provide for your over thinking mind a pillow of comfort on which to recline. Your pearls of wisdom are all I want to dine on. Feed my ears your food for thought. #EbrahimAseem

Lay your stress, your doubts, your demons & fears on my ears. I will comfort your concerns. Wipe your tears before they drip. Read the pages of your vibe & study your spirit to become fluent in your love language. #EbrahimAseem

Your genuine frequency speaks to me. Your kindness calms my soul. There will never be a second I don’t want only you, even after we grow old. #EbrahimAseem I want to teach you how to overcome the addiction of doubting & second guessing yourself.

The embrace of your conversation sends chills down the spine of my intellect. #EbrahimAseem Be my calm & I’ll be your peace. I will break down your guardedness & help take way your demons. Feed me substance & I will feed you consistency. Reassure you daily only you were meant for me. I love you, and I just want you to love you too.”

By: Ebrahim Aseem Follow @fuel4thebody
Author of the book, “Why Men Cheat On Loyal Women”
Instagram: @Fuel4TheBODY
Twitter: @EbrahimAseem

I am a chef & motivational speaker. I write new articles every thursday & speak life into groups of men at universities & corporations worldwide.

About Ebrahim Aseem

I am a chef, writer & motivational speaker. I've been a youth mentor for young Black men for 10 years & I'm currently shopping my first book, "Why Men Cheat on Loyal Women"
This entry was posted in Thought Provoking Articles and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Your mother raised you to be an INDEPENDENT survivor, not a WIFE.

  1. sam medina says:

    HI again, Ebrahim, How did you know? This is really ringing true. I have not talked to my Mother in 20 years -she always discouraged me and what was notable about me was my spirit even before I was born. SHE



    the birds and they sang back. I am now a professional Singer mainly in DC and paid. ..Only because I

    got away from her and her constant put downs and encouraging me to be a xray tech or pre- school

    teacher -something that would not upstage her former (failed) attempt to be a Concert Pianist.

    WELL I WON and I have a world class Operatic voice and it is beautiful and they pay me- and I did not

    get stuck taking care of her-let her favorites do that-they were her flying monkeys who she used to rat

    me out and not love me. Don’t worry E. I still pray for her. I just don’t let her use her narcissistic

    ploys get to me now. My Father and she were divorced when I was 5 and they had 4 children.

    See how right you are? Wow . Thanks S -ever your reader.

    Date: Fri, 28 Aug 2015 03:25:42 +0000 To:

  2. lovelyt26 says:

    Wow. While my mother never discouraged me, she never truly taught me how to love myself. She is an incredible woman who raised me the best way she knew how, but as I grow in GOD and HE is molding me into the woman HE created me to be, I realized there were many things I lacked as a child and when I become a mother, I will nurture my child and give her all the things I didn’t have. I have had too many people speak down to me as if I was a nobody, but now I realize it was an attack of the enemy because he knew who I was better than I knew myself. But now I’m reclaiming all the things he stole from me and be the woman GOD has made me to be. Ebrahim, thank you again for your blog. This particular article spoke to my spirit. Continue to uplift us my brother and may GOD continue to bless you abundantly. Love you my brother.

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