You’re SINGLE because No Man WANTS MARRIAGE only Curvy girls behaving like PORNHub
“If she doesn’t have a curvy body, round butt, flat stomach and light skin; guys don’t want her. But even then, he still doesn’t want marriage from her, he just wants to have sex with multiple women without commitment and without romance. Guys are such hoes, I swear.” the maid of honor complained.
“Males who think being romantic as a Man is “corny” or “soft” or “simp behavior” are simply insecure in their manhood and their sexuality,” I declared to a dozen Women I taught a Bridal Shower cooking class for.
By: Ebrahim Aseem
“Mentally mature men know Women just want to feel wanted. She doesn’t “want” our attention, she’s DESERVES it. There’s a difference. When I speak to young kings, I tell them, ‘we have to give consistent attention to a woman when we have all of her attention. Keep her on her toes; never let a woman get bored of you. Be spontaneous; consistently show her something new.
Let’s stop treating women as if we don’t care about them; in effort to get validation of our manhood from other males. When a male is more concerned with proving his manhood to other males and cares more about impressing other males than he cares about being romantically chivalrous with a woman, that is suspect.’
Loyal Women are Hopeless Romantics. Your standards are higher than your heels. Think of your dream man; think of your celebrity crush. You young queens deserve that tall, handsome, well groomed, confident, humble, successful, intelligent man with a romantic side; who is STRONG enough to protect you, yet romantic enough to stimulate you emotionally and hold your hand when he shows you off in public.
When I speak to large groups of young men, I tell them, ‘treat a woman how you want your mother, sister and future daughter treated by a man. Shower her with chivalry. Never let a woman walk on the STREET side of the side walk; walk between her & the street. Pull out her chair: open her door for her. Bring her flowers. It’s not corny young king, it’s CONSIDERATE. This idea in our generation of treating a woman with chivalrous respect being “corny” or “simp behavior” is ignorant, perpetuated by males who are suspect. Never call a woman, “bruh” “bro” “nigga” “homie” No! That’s suspect as well.
Don’t tell a woman to “man up” and “stop being so emotional”. No, she’s a woman, cater to her emotions; be understanding of her feelings. Treat her like a LADY, not like she’s your homie. Respect her femininity by making her feel safe and secure with your masculinity.
Being romantic does NOT mean being “soft”. If a woman doesn’t feel like you can PROTECT her; she will not respect you as a Strong Man. A woman knows she’s in the presence of a Man, not a male, but a Man, when she feels like she’s protected and feels safe. She will feel an euphoric jolt of invincibility, like no matter what happens, no matter who comes into her space; she will be protected and safe.
Take her out to dinner, then to a standup comedy show or to hear live music, symphony, musical, to the aquarium; to the conservatory of flowers. She really likes gardening and corny little musicals where they sing all the lines, but you would never know this, because all you want to talk to her about is sex.
Take her for a walk; cuddle up with her by the water; kiss her in public. Tell her you love her in front of your friends; don’t switch up how you treat her in front of your homies. Never put impressing your male friends over catering to your woman. Women love a respectable amount of PDA; women love to be touched, cuddled, massaged, and have her hair played with. Never be ashamed to show your woman affection. Complacency is not attractive to a loyal woman.
Don’t give up chasing her once you have her; keep proving yourself loyal and deserving of her attention. It doesn’t stop once you get her attention, in fact, that’s when you put in MORE work. We have to constantly be slightly scared to lose her; treat our woman like we don’t deserve her, so we will subconsciously consistently prove with our actions to her why we do deserve her.’
I like conversing with DEEP Thinking Young Classy Black Men, such as myself, as well as young classy men of all cultural backgrounds. Not all of us are ignorant; not all of us disrespect women, live off women and use women for money. Not all of us sag or dress in bummy Black Hooides all day. Not all of us are content with being a “baby daddy”; not all of us are afraid of commitment. Not all of us are uneducated; not all of us are incapable of formulating a properly articulated sentence. Not all of us are hoes, as your maid of honor described.
There are mos def strong, tall, well groomed, intelligent men, who know how to think DEEP and be a LEADER for his family and a rock of strength for a woman who can appreciate & respect his aggressive MANLINESS. When I speak to groups of Black men, they confess to me they dream of marriage. They have ambition; they have magnanimous goals. You may not see us readily, but trust me; we exist.”
“Ok, I’m a 30 year old grad student, with no kids, my own money, and I feel like I will be single forever. My sister has been married twice and both times she caught her man cheating on her with porn addition. I want to be a wife, but I don’t want to deal with divorce. My sister told me, ‘You’re single, because no man wants marriage only curvy girls behaving like PornHub’; and she’s right. Guys only approach me, because I’m curvy with ass. They don’t stimulate my mind; they don’t cater to my emotions. They’re not even romantic with me; the sex is just a pounding session. Don’t get me wrong, I love a little aggression in the bed room, but I need romance.
I crave sensuality and erotic stimulation; but all these guys want is a woman who will be a lady in the streets and their own personal pornstar in the bedroom. They want to choke you. They want that sick shit; they want ass-play. Basically, they want your relationship to resemble their PornHub app. How am I supposed to find a husband if I’m not the type of woman guys look for?” The maid of honor asked me.
“The guys you refer to who don’t WANT marriage and ONLY entertain the company of curvy women with cakes who will behave like a pornstar in bed; those males do not represent all men. A male and a man are not the same. Understand this.
If a male doesn’t have a romantic side with you as his woman: beware; that’s suspect. Heterosexual men love to cuddle with their woman. While it is true some men don’t like to cuddle after sex in bed, as he may prefer not to be touched while sleeping; if a male cannot be aroused by the natural femininity of a woman, without her behaving extremely lustful like a pornstar; that male is either on the down low and hiding it from you or on the Down Low unbeknownst to himself.”
The room full of women gasped. Some of them looked at each other and said, “mmm mmmh,” pointing to each other as if to say, “I told you about your man didn’t I?” Once I saw I had their attention again, I continued.
“This is why some males ONLY are attracted to curvy women with a fat round butt; yet he says things like, ‘I don’t eat pearl cuisine” or “vaginas or nasty and ugly’. That’s Down Low vernacular. When a male tells a woman he prefers to receive oral sex from a woman over vaginal sex; he’s subconsciously trying to tell you he’s not aroused by the female sex organ.
This is why males on the Down Low have gay sex with their woman. That is; while he’s having sex with a woman, he is using ONLY positions he uses with his boyfriend, while fantasizing he is having non-vaginal intercourse with someone of the same sex.
Heterosexual men are extremely attracted to women with curves and a nice shaped butt; however they’re also extremely attracted to women with slim, petite model frames, with a defined collar bone and a humble shaped butt; because quite frankly, women of all body types are beautiful, as they posses what heterosexual men are really attracted to; vagina. That attraction exists to ensure the continuation of the human race.
Males who are obsessed with watching twerking videos, Big Booty porn, WSHH Honey videos and are only aroused by a woman’s rear end and prefer this over having vaginal sex with a woman; do so, because it reminds him of the type of intercourse he enjoys with his Down Low lover.
You may be thinking, ‘but how is he on the Down Low? When I asked him if he’s in a relationship already, he said no.’ Understand how slick a lying male is. You asked him if he had a girlfriend and he said, “no.” Yet in his mind, he’s thinking, ‘well she didn’t ask me if I had a boyfriend, so technically I answered honestly.’
Many of these males who live in the gym, admirably dedicating much time to perfecting their physical physique. Yet, somehow they do not have the time to take a woman out on a date, show up to a family function or wedding with her as his date, or even text back or call back his woman within a reasonable amount of time, because he’s ‘so busy putting in work lifting weights at the gym’; many of those males spend so much time at the gym, because that’s the only place him and his Down Low lover can meet up and spend time. Why would a male spend 45 minutes lifting weights and an hour and 15 minutes in the showers or in the gym locker room? It’s because he’s intentionally dropping the soap bar.
A woman can tell if her boyfriend is secretly on the Down Low by his inability to be aroused by the natural female body. If a woman walks her boyfriend into the bedroom, gently massages his body, kisses his neck, and yet him and his right hand would much rather go in the bathroom together and watch PornHub on his phone than make love to his woman; this could be an indication he’s on the Down Low.
Just because a male watches pornography does NOT necessarily mean he’s on the down low, nor does it mean he’s not attracted to his woman’s body type. However, no heterosexual man would choose to have a virtual threesome with his right hand and his PornHub app over making love to his beautiful woman. That’s not “what guys do” it’s not “a guy thing” it’s not “a guy being a guy”, its as suspect as it sounds.
No heterosexual male would turn down vagina in favor of pornography. Some of you may be thinking, ‘Oh, but he’s just not attracted to HIS woman’s body type. He only likes the type with big breast or the type with big butts like in those porn vids.’ First of all, how do you even know he’s looking at the woman’s body when he watches porn? Yep.
Second of all, heterosexual men do not have a “type” of woman who “only her specific body type” makes him aroused. Let’s be honest; a guy will sleep with a kangaroo looking female if she has a working vagina. All of you young queens are beautiful, yet some of you may have been cheated on by males with a female who’s body type and facial structure you feel pales in comparison to yours.
Allow knowing this to disprove the notion that all men have only a ‘certain body type’ he is aroused by. The truth is many of us barely know what we like. Many of us like whoever likes us and lack the ability to turn down a woman of any body type who is pretty and giving us attention. The reason some males need a woman with a “specific body type” in order for him to be aroused, is because he’s simply not aroused not naturally aroused by a woman’s femininity.
A huge warning sign is a man who brings his phone everywhere he goes, including the shower and the restroom at a restaurant. Even when he’s asleep; you can’t find his phone and you’re like, ‘wait did this guy stuff his iPhone in his boxers?’ The reason he’s hiding his phone is not simply because he doesn’t want you seeing texts from other women; he doesn’t want you seeing texts from other men and screen shots of men in his camera roll.”
“Wow, ok my ex husband had a porn addiction,” the maid of honor’s sister confessed, “and in hindsight, I can see the warning signs you mentioned. He brought his phone with him everywhere he went and he was not a rude or angry man at all, yet whenever someone would touched his phone; he would just verbally attack them in a way I never seen him act someone before.
At the time, I just assumed like you said, ‘oh he must not want me to see his little side hoes texting him, or whatever, but the more I think about it; he would prefer to go in the bathroom and make love to his phone porn instead of making love to me.”
“See this is why I’m giving up hope on men and marriage,” one of the women complained. “It seems like every guy just wants a harem of hoes and sex without commitment. Where are all the good men?”
“The reason it seems that way is, because your exposure to what a man wants from a woman is limited to the males you meet, your girlfriends experiences with the males they’ve been exposed to, the reality shows you watch and the music you listen to,” I responded.
“These musicians who say in every song they make, how “bitches ain’t shit but hoes in tricks” are saying this, because they’re bitter. They know its not “hip hop” for them to make love songs about their Down Low lover, so instead; they make women-hating songs as a subconscious way to declare their un-attraction to women. They reduce a woman’s worth to “a bad-b with cakes” in each verse, because again, he’s uses this type of woman’s physical form to accompany his down low thoughts during intercourse. Males who hate women are secretly not attracted to them.
This is not a representation of what ‘every guy wants’ as you said. Males want promiscuity. Men want monogamy. We long for it. We crave it. We pray for it. You want to know where all the good men are? We’re hiding from all the weak minded females who think they’re queens, purely because of their looks and body. How is a female a queen when all she’s ever ALLOWED to cuff her were peasant males?
BE what you want to attract. Focus less on where the men are and focus more on improving your SELF, having more to offer than your beauty and curves, and growing to love your SELF more; that’s what attracts a KING.
When males ask me, ‘where are all the GOOD WOMEN?’ I tell them, ‘she’s hiding from immature males like yourself who can’t value her worth. She knows most males genuinely have nothing to offer her. She doesn’t even need a man, she deserves one. There’s a difference. She stays out of the way to avoid being confused with fast, unintelligent females. How are you a king when all you have ever cuff are hoe-maidens? Focus less on where the women are and focus more on mentally maturing into a man who can provide for him SELF; that’s what attracts a QUEEN.’
Don’t give up on marriage young queen, because your future husband is out there, patiently waiting for the opportunity to meet you. He is staying single without any side pieces, so when he meets you he will be emotionally available for you.
The reason you are single right now young queen is, because you are being loyal to your future husband who you’ve yet to meet. Imagine if you were in a relationship right now and no longer single. A month from now you meet your dream man; your soul mate, but wait, you’re already in a relationship. He sees you and wants to be with you, but doesn’t pursue you because he respect your current relationship; this is the importance of being single. You’re not really single, you’re in a committed relationship with your future husband.
My sister told me I have to be loyal to the idea of my future wife, even tho I may not have met her yet. So, once she walks into my life, I will be attractive to her. We have to ask ourselves, ‘am I attractive enough to my dream mate? Do I myself posses all the attributes I want in a mate?’ These are the questions I ask my self everyday. Even though I enjoy single life,
I can imagine being married. I envision daily having children; spending time with them. Playing with them and making them laugh; teaching them about life. Having a wife, spoiling her with love and attention, being goofy with her, making her laugh and smile every second I spend with her; providing for my family.
I honestly pray I have all this before my mother gets too old to enjoy a daughter-in-law and grandchildren. Everytime I see my moms, she always talks about wanting grandchildren from me and saying she raised me to be a husband. I have no idea exactly what to do to obtain that other than just perfecting my mental maturity, but because of this I now know; I’m not looking for a girlfriend, I’m not looking for a curvy woman just to have sex with; I’m looking for a Wife. I’m looking for a queen to compliment my inner king.”
I’m happy I can speak life into young people, even when I’m not doing speaking events and simply teaching a cooking class. I find pleasure reassuring young kings and queens they will indeed attract that special person they know they deserve. I’m fully aware of the war on monogamy that is currently taking place in my generation, and as men; I know it’s up to us to always remember the only woman who deserves any of our attention is a woman who can see our worth as a man just as clearly as she sees her own worth as a woman. However, we have to be careful never to treat a queen like she’s just any other female trying to compete for our time, because she’s not.
It’s important as men we make sure our Loyal Woman never feels she has to compete for our attention with any other woman. It’s cool to have a “celebrity crush”, but don’t be all obsessed over her; constantly talking about her to your woman and NEVER compare your woman to her. What the hell is wrong with you? She may laugh it off, but when you’re not there, she will sit & think like:
“So wait, does he feel he’s settling with me?
Does he want a woman who looks like her?
What was he trying to say by telling me that?
Does he want me to loose weight?
Does he want me to get implants or injections?
She will compare her body to her women you glorify to her with your words and attention. Also, don’t show more attention to PornHub than you do to YOUR woman. You didn’t notice your woman just got her hair nails done, new outfit, auburn highlights, because all you pay attention to are video vixens and pornstars who look NOTHING like your woman. She will compare her body to them, don’t put your woman through that; give her consistency & ALL your attention.
“What are we?” A woman should NEVER have to text us that young kings, because as a MAN; we have to be honest with her at all times. If your intentions with her is only to give her the “heavy D” without commitment, be a man & tell her; she may just be looking for some Vitamin D. If you’re courting multiple women at once, tell her; chances are you’re also not the only one trying to be her only one anyway.
What makes us a man, as opposed to just being a male, is our WORD and our honesty. I will tell you this though, don’t make a loyal woman wait too long before you faithfully commit yourself to her. The PLAYER phase some of us go through as men may impress your homies and it may attract all your side hoes, but what attracts an Intelligent, spiritual Beautiful Woman with a Beautiful Soul is a man who can:
BE CONFIDENT, BE CONSISTENT, BE HUMBLE, BE WELL-GROOMED & BE LOYAL. A woman will look at your past women to let her know what type of man you are in a relationship. This should matter to us, because we can hustle all day, stack money and chill with our homies all night and that’s fine for a while; but we will never be able to truly enjoy life, until we know the joy and benefit of faithfully committing ourself & all our attention to a loyal, mentally mature woman; trust me.
Women aren’t dumb; once some women see all we have to offer her is “heavy D”, she will keep us around, but only use us for sex if and when she needs it. She will have another man she takes out on dates, introduces to family, cooks for, caters to, opens up to, vents to, confides in, converses with, emotionally stimulates, has spiritual conversation with, makes love to, plans to start a Family with; oh yes. She has another man who she sees as her future husband, even if she is currently with you right now; she knows the exact man she wants to marry.
But, if all you have to offer her is your penis, your tail, your lower part; she will put you in the “side hoe” category. You think you’re playing her? No, she’s playing you. You think she’s your “side hoe”? No, you’re HER side hoe. I pray for growth for the males who are good enough for a woman to let inside her vagina, but not good enough to let inside her heart and penetrate her soul. You may be good enough to be a baby daddy, but she KNOWS you will never be good enough to be her husband and a father to her children.
A female may run over weak peasant males like a joke and laugh at them like they’re court jesters; but the strongest woman will be willing to open up her heart & loyalty to a Man as his Queen, once he proves with his actions he can be her KING.
By: Ebrahim Aseem
I am an author, and I do Public Speaking events in the San Francsico Bay Area.
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Awesome I couldn’t agree with you more! I wish this was a standard teaching in our culture!
I got a kick out of this one because me and my father were having a similar conversation just yesterday! After his marriage failed he started grooming me to be a wife but he was a Old HOE Bag! Every week he had a different woman then would treat me to a shopping trip, take me out to eat or even on vacation and state where ‘this one’ went wrong. So as i went on dating with high standards trying not to make their mistakes, seeing most MALES and treating them like KINGS as my father groomed me to, those MALES would fall short because they couldn’t match the small things my father would do: Having intellectual convo, being consistently considerate, choosing museums over a predictable movies (sounds bougie but i like what i like lol), even an occasional shopping trip. So after our conversation yesterday he apologized to me for scaring me into thinking every relationship was like a “Game of chess”, ‘constantly strategizing trying to get the King knockin innocent pawns off the board’ lol i had to stop him and explain how it wasnt as easy as it seemed knockin those poor pawn off my board. I tried grooming them also into being not just the man that i deserved but a man than any woman would desire, but the honest truth is I had to let them go in order for them to realized what they missed. But you cant expect any change if they’re not read for change themselves, so many are used to the bare minimum, females wanting a hand-out and them catering to the head on their dicks before the head on their shoulders and the weak ones would choose booty over brains but like the idea of having both! Im happy wit my self and my daughter id be more successful grooming a Princess into a Queen than as you say ‘ peasant’ into a King. Great post!
Another good one!! Great! I couldn’t stop reading