“They put every black man in the movies in a dress in some point in his career. Strong brothers, why do they want to see us in these dresses?” Dave Chappelle
“A woman shall not wear a man’s garment, nor shall a man put on a woman’s cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God.” – Deuteronomy 22:5 ESV
People are so fixated on Jaden Smith wearing a dress & Young Thug wearing make-up & lee press ons, they’re unable to see, the castration of Black Men starts in the mind, in the home, it starts with how we treat our women.
By: Ebrahim Aseem
Author of the book, “Why Men Cheat on Loyal Women”
#1 The “strong black woman” concept
Black women are always told to “be the strong one”. She can’t show her flaws, fatigue, weakness or shortcomings. She’s always made to feel she must “hold it together” in adverse times, while the men are allowed to wallow, drink, curse, yell & throw a temper tantrum… just like a little boy.
A small percentage of us Black men have created this strong woman concept, as a crutch for our lack of leadership. As men, we have no right to define a woman by how much strength she displays through pain. We are being cowards who lack leadership whenever we put it on a woman to always be the strong one alone.
Where are the provider men? The leader men? All our girls see is lair men & cheater men.
Where are men who take responsibility for a child they make, instead of leaving a woman to raise a life alone that he helped create?
As Black men, we must man the fuck up. We wear our bank account on our feet, the newest Jordans, while our babies wear frowns, wondering why their daddy doesn’t want them.
Let’s be men of accountability.
Let’s stop labeling our women “strong woman”.
She’s allowed to hurt while she’s resilient,
to care deep while she’s speaking her mind,
to grieve while being strong on her terms.
She’s not your strong woman, she’s a woman of strength who belongs to her SELF. A woman is not some thing to be defined or appraised, she’s a virtuous woman to be appreciated and praised. (proverbs 31:30)
#2 Single Mothers have to be “the mother and the father?
During slavery in America, when a Black man had a child with his wife, he was sold away to split up the family.
This was done intentionally, so his son would never be raised by a man to be a man. Done so his daughter would never have the love of her father, who could set the example of how a man should treat her. Growing up constantly seeking love of a man from every guy she meets.
3. Slavery has never legally ended in America
Even after the emancipation proclamation was issued by President Abraham Lincoln on January 1, 1863,
Slavery is still legal in the U.S. via prison, according to the 13th Amendment. Victoria’s Secret, Starbucks, Wal-Mart, Nintendo, Costco & Microsoft have all used prison slave labor.
Billionaires buy prisons, then outsource free prisoner labor to companies.
People of color are 30% of the U.S. population, yet 60% of the prisoners. 1 in every 15
Black men are in prison, while 1 in every 106 white men are in prison. (*1)
1 of every three Black men can expect to go to prison in their lifetime. (*2)
Black offenders receive sentences 10% longer than white offenders for the same crimes. (*3)
This is not about racism. The apparent imprisonment of Black men is done as a cognitive emasculation to outsource their free labor, harvest their organs via police shootings of unarmed men and sterilize the Black population by not destroying the Black home structure.
Slavery wasn’t about picking cotton. It was about stripping a spiritual people, favored by The Creator, of their identity, language, culture & rites of passage, force feeding them man-made religion.
When a Black man ran away from his master, his penis was cut off, forever stunting his growth from boyhood to manhood. Today, the aim is to destroy Black boys before they can grow to men, before their frontal cortex can fully cognitively connect and before pineal gland activation can commence.
4. The emasculation of black men has created an inverse mentality in the Black psyche, composed of two types of women:
A. Black women who are educated, successful, opinionated & financially self-sufficient are told they are tying to “be the man”.
B. Black women who treat Black men like boys, instead of holding them accountable as providers.
A woman must innerstand, allowing a man to live rent free in a home you pay all the bills in is treating a man like a boy. If you loved him, boyfriend or son, you’d him to pay his portion, have his own & be the self-provider he was put on earth to be.
A man must innerstand, a woman with her own mind, money & motives is not “trying to be the man”. Don’t fault her for being more of a man than you. She is being loyal to her ambitions. She refuses to wait around for a man to “save” her. When males say a successful woman is “trying to be the man” he’s really admitting her mind is cognitively maturing on a rate he can never grow to meet. I want a woman who knows that a queen without her king is STILL a queen. She doesn’t need a man to make her royal.
I want to go half on a baby with a woman who won’t raise my son to be a nigga. Won’t call him “cute lil nigga”. Won’t refer to me as “real nigga” or “my nigga”. Husband & father sounds better than “real nigga” to me.
What these wanna-be-hood-yet-square-on-the-low girls don’t realize is, projecting stereotypes of black culture will never attract commitment. Using nigga as both the subject & predicate in the sentence of all your social media posts may feel cute slipping through your lips, but it will ONLY attract you a male who is baby daddy material. You’re not Nikki. Stop speaking with such a high-pitched, upward-inflected, exaggerated tone of voice. Be yourself. Stop pretending you’re only trap music & swishers, when you’re really Taylor Swift & Game of Thrones. Embrace your natural self. Love your natural self. Innerstand, you are not in a universe, queen, you ARE one. State your intention to the universe and watch it submit itself to your vibration.
Likewise, a man is a universe. His mental maturity & cognitive growth depends on how resilient he is willing to work & self edify. Too many Black males are stuck in embryonic cognition, due to the mnemonic beat knock of hip-hop.
To be continued next week.
By: Ebrahim Aseem
Author of the book, “Why Men Cheat on Loyal Women”
Facebook.com/AEAseem
IG: @Fuel4TheBODY
Twitter.com/EbrahimAseem
Blog: RealNewsPaper.wordpress.com
Motivational #SpeakLife vidoes: Youtube.com/RealNewsmagazine
References.
*1 – https://www.aclu.org/infographic-combating-mass-incarceration-facts?redirect=combating-mass-incarceration-facts-0
*2 Bureau of Justice Stats – http://www.jstor.org/discover/10.1525/sp.2011.58.2.257?uid=2&uid=4&sid=21106484931793
*3 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bill-quigley/fourteen-examples-of-raci_b_658947.html
Ebrahim Aseem
Real News 
Ugh! Get out of my heart, I say! Great read. Bless God for your insight.
Superb. You and your efforts. thinking writing conscience responsibility.
Date: Thu, 16 Apr 2015 23:17:19 +0000 To: saintceciliasang@hotmail.com
Wonderful, Wonderful, read. This also gave me a new concept to my own blogging as well. As a black woman I was always told to be strong..but I felt like I wasn’t “bitchy” enough because of how black women are portrayed on tv. I felt like black men did nothing because of the media. These were my thoughts as a teen and a kid. Now I have grown to know that we are kings and queens momentarily knocked off our equal thrones. Thank you for the read!
Great Article! Bravo!
That was a great post. I’m glad to see that there are other brothers out there in this generation that are stepping up and being the real men that God created us to be. Much love and much respect to you, and keep fighting the good fight.